Smash Hits


This has given me far more pleasure that it should have.  I hope that someone out there gets some enjoyment out of it too.

Songs mentioned but not played:

All songs from the 15-28 January, 1986 issue of Smash Hits.

Thanks to the site Like Punk Never Happened for uploading, week by week, a copy of Smash Hits.  Your work brings joy to my heart.  To see the full copy of this issue click here.

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I wrote a book called Kaitiaki o te Pō

4 thoughts on “Smash Hits”

  1. I’m happy with all of this analysis. Unless, of course, the golden rule is something to do with the age of consent, but this seems unlikely.

  2. The Full Force reference to breaking the ‘golden’ rule, I believe, relates back to the earlier lyrics about allowing a carpenter to lay the tiles. When he says “meet me on the staircase girl, lets break the golden rule”. I’m thinking, he needs someone young and fit, on minimum wage, to get a hammer and break the (presumably) badly laid tiles. Honestly, I can’t think of any other rule a grown man would want break with a school girl – this, is literally, the only possible explanation.

    This should not be confused with breaking the ‘number one’ rule, which, as I’m sure you know, is to commit murder. And, the ‘cardinal’ rule is to allow the plumber to do the lawns, but, clearly, you know that one already.

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